


I wanna wake up where your love is

by emilia_kaisa



Series: way down we go [4]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Feelings, First Time Together, M/M, Not Beta Read, Porn with Feelings, Smut, wdwg missing scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 15:30:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17327621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilia_kaisa/pseuds/emilia_kaisa
Summary: Two people with difficult past feeling their way through their still new relationship, slowly and cautiously.But most importantly- together.(aka a missing scene from 'way down we go', also known as The Smut)





	I wanna wake up where your love is

**Author's Note:**

  * For [K1mHeechu1](https://archiveofourown.org/users/K1mHeechu1/gifts).



> So. My first smut attempt. I hope you enjoy I was trying real hard. This scene is set in the last chapter of 'way down we go' fic, the begginig here is straight copied so you can get into the mood!  
> Of course, 100% fiction!  
> Title stolen from 'Dream' by Bishop Briggs.

 

They avoided talking about what had happened in Canada, as if that could put a shadow on everything that was now so new and fragile between them. But it was a part of their lives, weighing on them and threatening to appear at the most unexpected moment.

It was an afternoon in late October when they stumbled into Yuzuru's tiny apartment, cheerful and rain- soaked.

„I told you it'd be like that!” Javier laughed and Yuzuru rolled his eyes, looking through his closet.

„I wasn't aware you could forecast weather.” he said, tossing Javier a t-shirt that looked way too big for either of them „Change before you get pneumonia.”

„You're not my mother.” Javier pouted while tooking his soaked shirt on and grabbing the dry one „Wow, this is at least twice your size, when did you get-” he stopped mid- sentence, suddenly sensing that something was off.

Yuzuru was staring at him, his expression unreadable in the dim light, and Javier shifted a bit, feeling oddly uncomfortable, still gripping Yuzuru's shirt in his hands.

„Hey, you okay?”

„Does it hurt?” Yuzuru asked quietly, a strange edge in his voice and Javier blinked, confused. Yuzuru took a few hesitant steps and now was standing so much closer, Javier could see slight fluttering of his eyelashes and feel his rapid breathing.

And then he understood.

„Sometimes.” he admitted softly and Yuzuru bit his lower lip, as if he was trying not to cry.

It was still so new, somehow, to see him so vulnerable and open. And also a little bit heartbreaking.

Yuzuru reached out, his fingers touching the scar on Javier's chest lightly, gently, with care.

Javier was already at peace with that scar and everything what was hidden behind it. It barely hurt, sometimes was just a little bit oversensitive. There were no troubles with breathing either, because one and a half of a lung was apparently perfectly enough for him. He sometimes joked about it with his friends, but he knew he couldn't do that with Yuzuru, who still was carrying more guilt than he ever let Javier know.

„Hey.” Javier said softly, grabbing Yuzuru's chin gently and making him look up „Don't do this to yourself.”

„I know you don't want me to feel guilty, but I can't help it.” Yuzuru said quietly, his eyes shining „It's- I was stupid. And I remember it all too well.”

Javier knew that there was nothing he could do to help him; that wound was yet to be healed, because in that case it was Yuzuru who had to forgive himself, not Javier.

And Javier could only try to make it easier.

„I know how hard this is for you.” Javier muttered, taking Yuzuru's face in his hands, bringing their foreheads together „But we're gonna make so many new memories, and this- this is just gonna be a reminder that I wasn't quick enough.”

Yuzuru chuckled wetly at that, his shoulders shaking.

„You promise?”

And Javier kissed him, becauese his chest was suddenly too tight and his heart was too full, and there was no going back for them now.

Yuzuru inhaled deeply, shakily, his breath fanning over Javier's collarbone. He was trembling slightly and Javier ran hand down his spine in a soothing motion. He pressed soft, light kisses on Yuzuru's neck, pulling him closer gently.

„Javi.” Yuzuru breathed out, drawing back a little to look Javier in the eyes, his gaze dark and almost desperate „Make love to me?” he basically asked and Javier's heart melted with an overwhelming affection.

„Okay.” he whispered hoarsely, kissing Yuzuru's nose before moving back to his lips, nipping on his bottom lips gently while his hands started caressing hot skin under Yuzuru's shirt. They took their time, getting rid of their clothes without stopping kissing if it wasn't absolutely necessary. And when they were finally bare against each other, Yuzuru sitting in Javier's lap, Javier already felt dizzy was want and electrifying tingling of his skin, as if there was an electric current running in his veins.

Finally, after the whole eternity or maybe ten minutes, Yuzuru detached himself gently from Javier's hold and reached to the bedside closet. He was back in a second, smiling sheepishly, and Javier's mouth went dry when he saw what he was holding.

„You'll need to guide me through this.” he said with a nervous chuckle and Yuzuru's face softened.

„Okay.” Yuzuru said, a bit breathlessly; he put his hand on Javier's chest and pushed him gently so he could lie on his back „I've got you.” he murmured, leaning forward and kissing Javier's neck before moving back to his lips.

It felt like a dream, to be like that, to have Yuzuru pressed so close and kissing him, half soft and half desperate and absolutely perfect. Javier thought dizzily that he could go on like that forever, but then Yuzuru's hips ground down against his just a little bit harder and Javier gasped at the sensation.

„Oh.” he moaned and and Yuzuru drew back, lifting himself on his elbows and looking down at him with lust filled eyes.

„Okay.” Yuzuru said hoarsely, and Javier noticed with fondness that he was blushing „So, umm-” Yuzuru stuttered, grabbing the small bottle and coaxing his fingers with lube. He gave Javier one more bashful smile and Javier watched in awe how he reached behind himself slowly.

Yuzuru let out a shaky breath, his face frowned, and Javier's heart was about to jumped out of his chest. It was mesmerizing, to watch Yuzuru's face like that, from so close, his expression focused and gentle.

Swallowing hard, Javier blindly reached for the bottle and opened it clumsily, and a moment later one of his fingers carefully joined Yuzuru's. The broken moan Yuzuru let out at the sudden intrusion was absolutely the hottest sound Javier had ever heard in his life.

Yuzuru groaned, dropping his forehead on Javier's collarbone, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin there, and Javier's whole body shuddered. Everything was blurred, dimmed by their arousal, an overwhelming ease of their bodies working together, and a part of Javier's mind couldn't believe they were there, touching and kissing and just _together._

Javier pressed his lips to Yuzuru's temple, twisting his fingers gently, and Yuzuru let out a shuddering moan that sent a shiver down his spine.

„It's okay, now.” Yuzuru panted out and Javier nodded, withdrawing his hand and wiping it on a sheet before placing it on Yuzuru's back.

Yuzuru leaned forward to give him a chaste, short kiss, and then sat back on Javier's hips, looking down at him with eyes filled with lust and just a shadow of uncertainity.

„Do you want to use a condom?” he asked and Javier gaped, because honestly, he had never thought about it before.

„Umm, I don't know.” he stammered, his thumb painting circles on Yuzuru's hip „How do you like it?” he asked, because he was comfortable with whatever Yuzuru wanted. He was healthy and he trusted Yuzuru without a doubt, and he would do anything to make him happy.

„I've never done it without.” Yuzuru admitted, his cheeks flushed, and Javier's heart fluttered.

„Okay.” he said, smiling easily „So maybe let's have one now and we'll see next time?” he offered softly and Yuzuru gave him the softest of smiles.

 

Javier had had his fair share of sexual experiences, but nothing was ever close to the feeling of Yuzuru slowly sliding down his dick, his face twsited with a mix of focus, pleasure and maybe just a tiny bit of discomfort. Javier put his hands on Yuzuru's hips, steadying but not pushing, and Yuzuru smiled at him with so much affection it was almost too hard to bear.

The sound Yuzuru let out when he was fully seated sent a thrill through Javier's body, and he had to stop his hips from pushing up. Yuzuru leaned down slowly and kissed him, sloppy and hot, and Javier was pretty sure nothing could feel better than that. But then Yuzuru started moving slowly and Javier's mind went completely blank. It felt beyond amazing and he had to use all his remaining willpower not to move and let Yuzuru adjust himself and find his rhythm. It was a torture, a sweet one, and he couldn't help quiet, soft moans from escaping his lips.

Suddenly Yuzuru pulled back, putting his hand on Javier's chest to steady himself, his eyes dark and wide, and for a second he looked almost scared.

„It's okay.” Javier smiled at him, taking on of Yuzuru's hands and kissing it gently, and Yuzuru shivered.

„I can't believe you're here.” he breathed out and Javier's mouth went dry, his heartbeat pounding in his veins.

„I'm here.” he whispered, his hands returning to Yuzuru's hips „Here, with you.”

Yuzuru closed his eyes at that, inhaling sharply.

And then, he moved.

It took them a moment to find the right rhythm and it felt delirious. Javier's body ached, that sweet, tortorous pressure coiling in the pit of his stomach and threathening to swallow him whole. Yuzuru was a sight like that, strong and on the top of the world, but there was also some kind of vulnerability in his, something what was still so new for Javier to see.

Yuzuru was so strong, intense, and still so caught up in his guilt, and Javier almost couldn't breathe, pleasure and his feelings for Yuzuru vibrating in the every fibre of his body.

„Javi.” Yuzuru whined brokenly, his hips snapping down in an almost frantic pace, and suddenly it was too much for Javier to take. He sat up in one swift move, wrapping his arma around Yuzuru's hips and crashing their hips together. Yuzuru let out a quiet scream, tilting his head back, his body arching, hands grabbing Javier's shoulders. It was frantic now, bodies chasing after the same goal, and Javier couldn't stop even if he wanted to.

„Yuzu.” Javier choked out, his eyes falling shut, lips closing on Yuzuru's shoulder „I- I ne-”

„It's okay, it's okay.” Yuzuru muttered, almost sobbing, and Javier whined, not able to hold back any longer.

He came suddenly, without a warning, and the strength of his orgasm blinded him, the pleasure so strong it was almost painful. For a moment he wasn't sure where he was, who he was, if the world was still there. He came back to his senses slowly, and the first thing he realized was that Yuzuru was still wrapped around him, his errattic breathing loud in Javier's ear, and he had never felt more embarassed in his entire life.

„I'm sorry.” he mumbled, pressing a soft kiss to Yuzuru's shoulder where his teeth left a faint mark. Yuzuru chuckled breathlessly, grabbing his face gently and kissing him on the lips.

„Don't apologize that I can make you feel so good.” he muttered and Javier's heart clenched.

Slowly, carefully, he laid Yuzuru down on the matress, taking in the view of his slender, sweaty body, disshelved hair and still hard cock. Yuzuru smiled at him, his eyes foggy, and Javier had to swallow past the lump in his throat.

There were so many feelings inside him now, some of them already familiar, some so brand new he was only beggining to understand them.

He couldn't speak, so he only licked his swollen lips and leaned down, kissing Yuzuru hard and drawing a soft moan out of him. He put his palm over Yuzuru's heart and then started sliding it down his body, his fingers worrying his sweaty skin until he stopped in between Yuzuru's legs. Without breaking the kiss, Javier wrapped his fingers around his erection and Yuzuru's whole body tensed, his back arching.

„Oh yes.” he moaned as Javier started stroking him in fast moves „Yes, Javi, I-” he babbled, his head trashing, and Javier couldn't take his eyes off of him.

„I've got you, it's okay.” he promised hoarsely, pressing his lips to the hollow of Yuzuru's neck, his hand on Yuzuru's cock speeding up „Let go, I've got you.”

Yuzuru came with Javier's name on his lips, his body twisting against Javier's, his face a picture of pure pleasure. He was still breathing hard when Javier started pressing soft, soothing kisses on his forehead and cheeks, his tongue catching a little bit of salt that wasn't coming from sweat.

„You good?” Javier asked quietly and Yuzuru nodded shakily, pulling him closer for a sloppy, warm kiss.

„Just a little bit overhelmed.” he mumbled against Javier's lips and then breathed out deeply, looking at him with so much affection Javier's heart skipped a beat „You good?”

„Never felt better.” Javier admitted softly, carding through Yuzuru's messy hair. They shifted around a bit and finally found a nice position, with Yuzuru's head resting on Javier's chest, his lips pressing soft kisses to the scar there. It all felt almost painfully warm and intimate, and in that moment Javier knew that he loved that men, who was now breathing regularly by his side.

They had already come such a long way, and Javier hoped- knew- there was so much more for then to face.

Whatever that was, they would do it all together.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it, don't hesitate to tell me what you think and thank you for reading!


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